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Interview from the Depression Wellness Network Newsletter. The Depression Wellness Network is a non-profit organization committed to educating, supporting and connecting those interested in the wholistic care of depression. They are based out of Seattle, WA. Learn more about them at www.depressionwellness.net

Interview with Dr. Kyra Mesich

Author of The Sensitive Person’s Survival Guide: An Alternative Health Answer to Emotional Sensitivity & Depression

Describe your training/background:
I was trained in a traditional, doctoral clinical psychology program. I had no intention of venturing professionally into the field of alternative health until I had some experiences that changed the way I viewed emotions.

How did you get interested in this topic?
While I was working as a psychologist at a large counseling center, I began having experiences of literally feeling my clients' emotions, as if they were my own feelings. The first experience occurred when one evening I suddenly felt a wash of depression come over me. At the time it didn't make sense to me. I couldn't understand why I would suddenly feel so depressed for no apparent reason. The answer presented itself the next day when I saw a young, male client who described in exact detail the depressive episode that I felt. As he described his own depression from the previous night, it explained the time of onset and the exact thoughts and mood I felt. It was beyond coincidence. I had to accept that the confusing depression I felt that night was not mine at all, it was his. I had literally felt this young man's emotions, at the same time he was experiencing them.

This radically changed the way I conceptualized emotional experiences. In my traditional training program, a possibility such as this, to empathically feel another person's emotions, would be deemed impossible. Nonetheless, it happened to me, and I became aware of many more times when I was sensing clients' and acquaintances' emotions within myself.

At the time, I was scared and confused by these experiences. I didn't know what was causing them, what to call them, or how to control them. This led me to study much more about it, and I found that these emotional experiences fell under the realm of empathic ability. Not surprisingly, I wanted to learn as much as I could about empathic ability. What intrigued me the most was how I sensed these other people's feelings, as if they were my own emotions. If I had not seen these people as counseling clients, I would never have had the information to know that I was feeling their emotions. I would simply have assumed that it was my own depression I was feeling.

So it made me wonder, how prevalent is empathic ability in the general population? And how many empathic people were sensing other people's emotions, but assuming that the feelings were coming from their own psyche? In other words, how many people with chronic, unremitting depression were actually empathic? This was a radical idea, and a completely new way of thinking about psychological diagnoses. I had to forge out on my own to study it further.

In your opinion, how does sensitivity relate to depression?

Let me answer that question by explaining my research of empathic ability. I collected many case studies of people who had admitted to having one or more empathic experiences, and I quickly began to see a commonality among them all. All of these people described themselves as emotionally sensitive. That is, they stated that they generally felt emotions deeply, were easily hurt, couldn't shake off emotions, were prone to stimulus overload in loud or crowded environments, and many of them complained of recurrent depression or anxiety. All of them stated that they felt their sensitivity was a weakness and wished they could be tougher, or more thick-skinned.

This became the biggest revelation of my research. I had found the psychological correlate of empathic ability, and it was emotional sensitivity. What this means, is that all emotionally sensitive people are empathic. Underlying empathic ability is the explanation for many sensitive people's recurrent depression or anxiety.

Do you have any helpful hints for people experiencing both (sensitivity & depression)?

In our society, people generally think of sensitivity as a weakness. When a sensitive person also suffers from depression, he/she receives a further blow to their self-esteem, because many people view depression as a weakness of character. What I have found is that nothing could be further from the truth. Emotional sensitivity is actually an indicator of empathic and intuitive strength. Confusing, recurrent depression results because our society doesn't teach us about the existence of empathic ability. Therefore, we have no way of understanding or controlling it. Our empathic ability continues to work, even though our society doesn't condone or talk about it. That leaves sensitive people with a skill that is unnamed and unappreciated. This is an entirely new way to think about sensitivity and accompanying depression.

Why would it be beneficial for someone to read your book?

The Sensitive Person's Survival Guide contains information that is not currently available anywhere else. I have taken a huge risk with this book, to explain and discuss my own experiences and my research into sensitivity and empathic ability. As I've mentioned above, some people will have a hard time intellectually understanding my theories. Nonetheless, I felt it was incredibly important to share this vital information with sensitive people (and sufferers of depression and anxiety). This new approach to sensitivity and depression can radically change a person's life, make sense of years of confusing emotions, and turn sensitivity from a supposed weakness into a strength. I felt that made it worth the risk.

Do you offer any other services for people who are sensitive?

In this short interview, I've just skimmed the surface of my work with sensitivity. I want your readers to know that my book also contains information about specific, alternative health remedies that will help them reconnect with their empathic ability and rebalance their sensitivity. I will keep my website (www.KyraMesich.com) constantly updated with my latest works, mp3 meditations, and a quarterly newsletter. My goal is to provide a clearinghouse for alternative health information and a sense of community for sensitive people who want to understand the true, underlying nature of their sensitivity. I hope that in time we will affect common thought about sensitivity, so that sensitivity will finally be acknowledged as the empathic, intuitive strength that it is.

Kyra Mesich earned her doctoral degree in clinical psychology from the Florida Institute of Technology APA-approved program in Melbourne, FL. In the years since her training, Dr. Mesich has studied extensively in the field of alternative health. By studying such practices as herbalism, flower essence therapy, energy healing, and meditation, Dr. Mesich seeks to uncover the true meaning and underlying source of the emotional suffering so many of us endure. Dr. Mesich is the author of the award-winning book, The Sensitive Person’s Survival Guide: An Alternative Health Answer to Emotional Sensitivity & Depression, available through www.KyraMesich.com. To order by mail, send $16.90 ($12.95 for the book + 3.95 s/h) to Dr. Kyra Mesich, PO Box 80208, Minneapolis, MN 55408. Please make your check out to Dr. Mesich.