Inner
Health
A Newsletter
from Dr. Kyra Mesich
Autumn/Winter
2000
Greetings,
and welcome to Inner Health! The
topic of this premiere issue is meditation.
Everyone
seems to know that meditation has plentitudes of positive benefits, but
few people understand exactly what meditation is, much less how to begin
learning this important skill. Meditation is a basic building block in maintaining your
health and well-being. Regular
practice of meditation allows you to have a deeper connection with
yourself. The benefits of
this are vast. Relaxation and
connection with your intuition are only the beginning of the rewards that
come from meditation.
Q&A: MEDITATION
* What is meditation?
Meditation is simply the act of
moving beyond the constant chatter of thoughts, to a calm place deeper in
yourself. In this quieter
place you can get in touch with your own inner wisdom to relax, heal, find
the answers to problems, and get to know the real you.
People in our culture have a lot of misunderstandings about
meditation. They try to make
it much more complicated than it is.
*Is meditation a
spiritual practice?
“Spiritual” is a loaded
word. Many people associate “spiritual” with organized
religion, and that can send them running the other way.
But “spiritual” really only relates to getting in touch with
the non-physical part of you, sometimes referred to as the “spirit.”
We are much more than our physical bodies.
It’s easy to see that we have a vast inner landscape, where
dreams, memories, and intuition come from.
Meditation is the means to tap into that inner realm, which is
actually the largest aspect of who you are as a person.
If you consider getting in
touch with this subconscious realm to be a religious endeavor, then your
meditation practice will have religious connotations.
If you prefer to leave religion out of it, and see meditation
purely as a means to get to know yourself better, then that is what your
meditation practice will be. So
to answer the question, yes, meditation is a spiritual practice, but only
in terms of tapping into the spirit, the non-physical part of you.
Whether you choose to incorporate religious beliefs into your
meditation is entirely up to you.
*Do I need to sit
cross-legged and have complete silence in order to meditate?
Contemporary Western people
have misconceptions about meditation.
Maybe that’s because we have had so few roles models to look to,
so we end up looking to Eastern philosophies and practices for
information. Meditation is
actually the most adaptable health practice you can undertake.
You can meditate while sitting in your favorite comfy chair, in a
hammock, while walking, or even while sitting cross-legged after doing
yoga or tai chi. It’s up to you. All
that is required is at least a few minutes of non-interrupted time.
That means no answering the phone, no kids demanding your
attention, etc. Some people
achieve this only by leaving the house and going for a walk, some people
have a den or basement room where they can get some solitude, but for
other people their only room for respite is the bathroom!
Uninterrupted time can be a precious commodity in our hectic
society. As you practice
meditation, you’ll find that eventually it won’t matter as much where
you are or what the distractions are around you.
It’s only in the beginning when you are first learning that you
really need to have some dedicated quiet time.
*How is meditation
related to or different from relaxation or hypnosis?
Relaxation, guided imagery,
self-hypnosis and meditation are all very similar.
They all involve quieting the conscious mind.
The major difference between these varied practices is the goal,
not the activity itself. Relaxation
is undertaken to relieve stress and tension.
Self-hypnosis and guided imagery are generally practiced in attempt
to solve a specific problem such as a physical illness, insomnia, or
quitting smoking. The goal of meditation is more global, to become familiar
with your subconscious self. Having
a more global goal, meditation embraces all the other goals just
mentioned. Meditation
relieves stress and aids healing on all levels.
It’s really just a matter of semantics, though.
All of these practices are basically the same.
It’s amazing that some people who engage in or train clients in
progressive relaxation don’t “believe in” hypnosis or meditation.
That’s just silly. We need to get beyond the words and realize that calming the
mind and getting in touch with your inner self is beneficial, and is the
true goal of all of the above practices.
*Why is meditation so
beneficial?
Day in and day out our lives
are focused on the external world around us.
When we focus only on the outer, physical world, life is confusing,
frenetic, and sometimes seems meaningless. We need to have access to our
inner self in order to make sense of life, to be able to use our
intuition, and to understand other people.
But, unfortunately, in our society most of us don’t know this
until we are well into our adulthood.
It’s no wonder that so many people feel stressed, empty, and
frazzled. We were never
taught to access our own inner resources. It’s like living with 95% of your resources unavailable to
you. So I, personally, would
go one step further to say that some form of meditation is not only
beneficial, it is necessary, in order to reconnect with your inner self.
It’s impossible to live life to the fullest without a connection
to this vast inner source of power and wisdom.
*How can I learn how to
meditate?
Learning meditation can be a
tricky business because it is very different from our everyday,
conventional approach to life. Meditation
actually is very simple, but it is a matter of learning to move past the
chatter of the mind to a deeper place within.
That is the main challenge for most people, who have grown up in a
world where we are taught to constantly look outside ourselves, never
within.
The best approach to learning
meditation is a slow approach. Don’t
“try” too hard or get frustrated.
Those kinds of feelings are not compatible with meditation.
Alternate meditation at home with meditative activities such as
yoga, gardening, or for some people it may be swimming or running.
Find the activity that you really like and notice how your mind
calms and you are centered and focused while engaging in the activity.
Eventually, you’ll be able to achieve that feeling during your
meditation. You’ll get better at it slowly over time as you engage in
varied types of meditative practices.
Oh, and one last point, most people approach meditation far too
seriously. Believe it or not,
meditation should be a happy, “light” activity.
You are learning to be whole, to reconnect with your inner self.
That is a joyous event when it happens.
*How did you learn to
meditate, Dr. Mesich?
It happened gradually over
years, so it’s hard now to remember the specific things I did.
I know that it all began with hypnosis.
I learned to do therapeutic hypnosis during my doctoral psychology
training (which is unusual compared to most clinical psychology programs).
I regularly used hypnosis with patients because I found it to be so
effective in quickly getting clients in touch with their emotions, and the
reasons for them. Patients
who suffered from memories of abuse and trauma were healed ten times more
effectively with hypnosis, rather than conventional talking therapy.
While working with these
clients, I saw glimpses of their subconscious and their inner self, and I
realized that the outer manifestation of ourselves is only a mere fraction
of who we are. This is what led me to study much more about alternative
healing practices. Years
later, when I was researching empathic sensitivity and writing The
Sensitive Person’s Survival Guide, I found my key for successful
meditation.
The key was to focus attention
on the solar plexus (the area of the body between the chest and belly),
rather than in the head. Through
years of meditative practice, I had learned to focus my attention, so it
was just a matter of focusing that attention to a different area of the
body, rather than between the ears where we all spend most of our time
thinking, worrying, and focusing our attention.
I never took any specific
classes in meditation, although I have taken yoga, which is related in a
lot of ways. Learning to meditate was a gradual process over a number of
years, and now I am able to connect with my intuition and inner self
anytime, anywhere. I am
thankful that I have gotten to this point, and I wish that more people
knew they could also learn to do this.
It is a great way to live. Life
is much more meaningful and rewarding.
*No matter what I do, I
can’t seem to concentrate for very long before my mind drifts or
thoughts interfere with my meditation.
Will I ever be able to learn to meditate?
Believe me, this is a very
common lament. There are a
couple different reasons why people have difficulty concentrating.
First, you are not just learning to meditate, you are unlearning
the focus on your thoughts. We
are encouraged from day one to listen to our thoughts and pay attention to
them constantly. But in order
to meditate, you have to move past your thoughts.
That’s the roadblock for many people.
They’re stuck in their thoughts and don’t know how to get
around them. Again, I refer
to the solar plexus. Turning
your meditative focus to this area of the body, rather than your head, can
help you separate enough from your thoughts to move past them.
If your attention drifts back up to your head, just move it back
down to your solar plexus. It’s
unusual at first, but in time it will become second nature.
At another level, I’ve found
that in order to meditate successfully, to truly connect with your inner
self, you have to feel safe. If
you don’t feel safe and protected at any level of your being, your mind
may jerk you out of meditation just as you start to feel like you are
“getting there.” This is
because your conscious mind is trying to protect you and puts up your
guards when you begin to approach the subconscious level.
What causes people to feel
unsafe? A history of trauma or abuse of any kind (sexual, emotional
or physical), growing up in a chaotic family or, conversely, a completely
unemotional family, or any number of other experiences that have left you
feeling unprotected, including psychic sensitivity. This doesn’t mean you can’t meditate because of your
family history, but it does mean that you may need to heal the scars you
carry before you go any deeper into your meditative practice. Look into flower essences, Reiki energy healing, or any other
alternative healing practice you feel pulled toward.
I’d recommend that you read
more about this topic if you think it might apply to you because it is a
common problem, and there’s just not enough room here to give the topic
the importance it deserves.
**
